Tuesday, March 8, 2011

kind of depressed

I was thinking about having a heart to heart with my son, but he has his girlfriend over.  I am frustrated and angry about the whole food thing.  I know he does this because he feels bad, but I shouldn't have to be abused either.  I want to share the Al-Anon program with him even though I know he won't do anything for himself.

I can't let myself be sucked into cleaning up after him or doing anything for him that he can do for himself.  It isn't the way to help him.

I do hope someday to have a real relationship with my children.  It pains me to think I won't, but we don't have much in common.  They don't like the main activities I do.  I often feel I wasted 21 years of my life.  I need to let go.

This is one of those nights when I feel I should reach out and call someone on that call list, but I'm not really connected to people in the group yet so I feel a little weird about it, but I so strongly feel that I need help tonight.  There's no-one else to turn to for support.

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