I react mainly to my son, daughter, and husband's behavior. I interact with them the most. I also react to traffic and student behavior.
If I felt I could choose who to act towards them, it would be peaceful, loving, and truly accepting. I am learning to breathe and chant slogans to myself to attain that peace because some of my reactions to traffic were really crazy. I don't realize I have so much pent up anger until someone cuts me off in traffic. I would just holler, sometimes I'd try not to let them cut me off or follow too closely to show them - revenge. Once I turned around to get out of the long line, but I got stuck in the mud on the other side. It's just lucky someone with a wench was right there. I was embarrassed, and it would have taken me so much longer to get to work if he hadn't been there. I guess God took pity on me and/or used it as another lesson but softened the impact.
Activities which make me feel peaceful: breathing, practicing the what am I grateful for, physical activity, reading a good book, watching a movie.
If I have a difficult day, the things I could do: sit in hot tub, walk the dog, pet the cats, read, watch a favorite movie, call someone from Al-Anon. I could do all this instead of my usual venting which really bothers my husband as he takes it all personally. It also adds to my son's stress load and actually to my stress load when I overfocus on my anxiety. I can chant slogans to myself, get out the literature and meditate on it. The main thing I don't want to do and have done pretty well with is not eat to feel better because in the end I feel worse when I overeat. I can't sleep well with heavy food in my stomach and I don't like being overweight. Hiking in beautiful places and kayaking also are peaceful, but I have to watch my tendency to go into my head and not see what's around me. It's too easy to go to that zone, but I have begun to be conscious of it and say Stop!
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